London Baby.

I am back in Kintore after a few days in London. I went to see friends and family as it was school holidays for the boys. We travelled by train, which despite being a lengthy journey wasn't unbearable and I have to say that considering how bored I was, the boys behaviour was impeccable. Obviously there was some whining and restlessness, but they hardly argued. Neither with each other or me. To be fair I plied them with food most of the trip, in an attempt to keep their mouths occupied. On the train ride down, mum met us on the train at Newcastle, which was an amazing help and company for me.

This journey has made me realise what a very nervous traveller I am. I think it's to do with having tickets and allocated seats. I'm the same flying. I am constantly checking that I have the tickets and am not happy that I am in the right seat until the ticket inspector has been along. I had reserved tickets and thank god I did, as we'd have been standing for the majority of the journey. Others clearly do not have such concerns. On the trip back I had moved to sit with the boys for a few minutes (we didn't have a table on our return, so they sat across the aisle from me) and a woman and her mother got on and went to sit in the window seat next to mine, which was vacant at the time but had been reserved from a station a bit further on and then her mother went to sit in my despite my book being on the seat and my handbag on the floor. I suppose I could have sat in with the boys but I thought, 'No, I've paid for three seats, I'm having three seats,' and so sent her on her merry way. Really nicely though. I wasn't rude.

I would never sit in a seat with a reservation ticket on it without looking at it to see where it's reserved to and from. I often wonder if I go through life thinking about this sort of stuff too much. Should I just sit where I want and deal with the consequences later or am I right to make sure I'm not in some body's seat and save them the palava of asking me to move. Do I do it because I hate most confrontation? Because I don't want to look stupid? Because I like to be in the right place at the right time? All of these things, probably.

It was truly lovely to be back in London. I miss the hustle and bustle. Everything is on the go twenty four - seven. Traffic is busy, pavements are congested, the constant sound of a siren in the background. All things I took for granted when I lived there, but are non existent here in Kintore. I'm sure if we lived in Aberdeen itself, these things would be around us. Watching the London news was so different. Gun and knife crime are still a big part of London, but since being here I've not seen or heard about a murder. The biggest news in Kintore is the floods. In my absence last week there were several parts of Aberdeenshire flooded, parts of Kintore included. A farmer who lived in our village went out on his tractor to rescue some of his livestock and in doing so must have been swept away by the water. The police spent three days searching for him and yesterday afternoon they found his body. His was 81, which doesn't make it any better, but I think there was a feeling of he had lived a long life and wasn't leaving any young children behind. It's still sad though. I read news reports about this on-line and saw that Kintore was 'devastated' and 'shocked' at such a tragedy. Which it is, but as it really must have shook people as things like this just don't really happen. Part of me likes that the boys could potentially grow up being sheltered and the other part (the NORF London part) of me, feels they should be exposed to the harsh realities of City life (not right now, when a bit older), so they can cope with things in life that just are pleasant. I suppose there is still plenty of time for this. They don't need to know about guns, knives and drugs just yet.

It was so lovely to see you all and catch up although I never feel we have enough time to talk. You all looked well and I have to say Rosa was positively blooming. I love how we talked about people who then turned out to be two tables behind us. Xanthe taking photo's (how I wish I had your camera confidence), Fran staying awake past ten pm, Becca and her aggressive cleaning tales and Nomi doing the 'I shall pretend I'm scratching my shoulder with my chin when I'm really trying to look over my shoulder. Very Molly Ringwald in 16 Candles.

I loved my Starbucks coffee with lovely Amber - skinny latte with a extra shot of bitching. I miss our kitchen day terribly. Looking at outfits and boots on the internet and planning tattoo's. I miss lots of things, but I love Kintore. I love looking out of the window of our living room with the heating on and cup of tea and the truly grim weather outside. I love our house. I'm not smug and I would never take any of this for granted. Who knows when it could be taken away. I love the space of our garden, our wardrobes, our shower, the tumble dryer. I love parking off road outside my house. I love the boys having such lovely neighbours to play with and that they can scoot in the street. I love their nursery. I love the butchers. The Dr's and the kind, kind people at the hospital who are helping me with my diabetes. I love my children and my husband and I know only too well how very blessed I am to have my family. I know how awful it was to almost loose it.

Yes, I do hanker after my City life and I do have moments of wanting to go 'home', but deep in my heart I am home. Home with the loves of my life. Home with the people who love me. The people I love and miss in London, will always be loved by me, wherever I am. I miss you. I love you. I will always be here for you.

I will see you all soon. If not when we are down the weekend of the 7th, then at Christmas.

Love, as always

Sally

p.s. If I'm honest, if Aberdeen had an Ikea, I wouldn't give a toss about London!!!